Endless Parade of Excellence

Tuesday, December 31, 2002
Made a lobster yet? No? How 'bout a steak? I like the part about growing your own meat in a "special machine, like a bread maker".
(via slashdot)

Sunday, December 29, 2002
Here's a nice collection of flashbulbs including some very cool ones like infrared bulbs. I actually have some of the bulbs that he considers "very rare"; I've been meaning to scan the boxes for a while. Someday I'll do it. I use my bulbs, the light is unlike electronic flash- it's a look that is almost extinct. Setting off a big bulb like a Press 40 is like uncorking a vintage wine- you do it with the knowledge that there's a finite number of them in the world, and you just subtracted one from that number.

Saturday, December 28, 2002
Make Ur Own Lobster! They obey your every command!

I could spend a whole day looking at stripmine.org. My dad worked on the oilsands project in the '60s, and I've always liked really big machines. Lots of hi res photos of the oilsands on the Suncor site.(look under Oilsands) Nothing about the bucket-wheel excavators, though, they were the ones that blew my mind as a kid.

Lookit these vintage side show banners. I can remember sort of the tail end of the freak-show thing at the Calgary Stampede- midget people and horses mostly. There was some scarier stuff which I was too young for, so I don't remember. I was somewhat dissapointed in a whale that turned out to be dead and stuffed- I'm not sure how I thought they'd fit a live whale in a semi-trailer, but I had to admit it didn't say ALIVE! on the side. The CNE used to have a Man Eating Chicken! , which turned out to be a man, eating chicken.

Thursday, December 26, 2002
Didn't get that ipod you wanted? Would it make you feel better if someone burned Santa's uvula off with a laser?

Wednesday, December 25, 2002
If you haven't found the perfect christmas gift for me yet, this watch would do nicely. They get bonus marks for not marketing a constant input machine as a perpetual motion device. I think there are similar designs which use barometric pressure changes.
(Thanks, Dan!)

Monday, December 23, 2002
Do your kids envy the dog because they don't get to eat the remote control?

I was just enjoying listening to Rock the Casbah on MuchLoud, here at work. Now I realize they were probably playing it because Joe Strummer is dead.

Sunday, December 22, 2002
Nice page of Japanese Subway Chimes. Have your friend put on white gloves and shove you around for the full effect.

Saturday, December 21, 2002
For those who watch the Supaflex video, and were wondering about the gesture that the dude makes to the car:

"..on video it is not a fuck which I make to the nice motorist (it was a lady in more...) but a friendly sign... with the inch and the auricular one like the surfer in place kind!"

(babelfish translation)

One more monkey post, then I'll stop. This guy had monkeys in his pants. Don't put monkeys in your pants, people. It's bad for you, it's bad for the monkeys. (via Boing Boing)

Friday, December 20, 2002
Hey! Hey! We're the Monkeys! One monkey hangs with Tibetan Monks while another lives in the suburbs writing lurid HTML.

The Humanatone Nose Flute.
"Unsurpassed for that loud whistle so often used to express appreciation for a great pair of legs."
Imagine construction workers with pink plastic thingys up their noses. Be afraid.

A new Supaflex video! Those crazy french guys with their weird skateboards. Glad I'm not driving the red car.

Thursday, December 19, 2002
Just what the heck do people expect when they get on a ride called "perilous plunge" anyway? I can't wait to see what happens when this thing goes nuts. Hope the mall janitor has a big mop.
(That last one via slashdot, so expect a bit of a wait)

Wednesday, December 18, 2002
Yes, kids, you can do surface mount work in a toaster oven. A few weeks ago I bought a toaster oven that turned out to be possesed by Satan. I called the 800 number and they basicallly went "Yup it's broken. Cut off the cord and send it to us and we'll send you a new toaster oven." It's just like a gopher derby, all they want is the tail, not the whole gopher. So, is nursing your gopher back to health, after you cash in the tail, cheating?

Tuesday, December 17, 2002
It's -13 out today. A good day to play the Warm Your Pussy game.
(via The Reverse Cowgirl's Blog)

Saturday, December 14, 2002
Ha! Here it is! And directed by Claude Jutra! Soon as I can get my shopping cart to the checkout in French, I will have it!.

Longboarding: "It's very evil. You have to take it easy." It's true. Montreal is a great place for longboards. I even saw kids with longboards. I stumbled across this page looking for info on a 1966 NFB film called The Devil's Toy, which according to Jocko Weyland in The Answer is Never, features "..kids skating through the streets of Montreal, drinking milk and throwing rocks at cops". I MUST see this film. Maybe I've already seen it. I have dim memories of being shown a film as a child about the "dangers" of skateboarding- of course it made it look like a hell of a lot of fun. This was way before the big craze of 75 and 76, and I don't think I had ever seen a skateboard before that film, but I remember it vividly.

Is my computer fried? No way,dude! It's baked!
Thanks, Dan!)

Friday, December 13, 2002
On ebay, they're selling squirrels by the foot.

It's nice to know you can give your child a thorough education using nothing but rubber "bugs"!

I wonder what happens to your mind if you spend 8 or more hours a day working on an assembly line making "adult novelties". It might make a good documentary. Take your DV cam and head to Sun Poro International and you can make that film. I like the no-nonsense names in their product line. I wish they had more pictures of that machine, though.

Squirrel-heavy site of Japanese Park Animals.
(via Sharpeworld)

Thursday, December 12, 2002
Our home-grown kaiju, Cadborosaurus doesn't even beat Giant Octopus on that big kaiju chart. No wonder it got killed.
(and, before my sister jumps in, yes, I know what that carcass probably is. )

Musuem of Retro Technology. I had no idea some of this stuff even existed. Things like monowheels! They're even cooler than the zorb.
(via Boing Boing)

Wednesday, December 11, 2002
Remember when it was cool to post reviews of Family Circus books on amazon.com?

Hey, how much does Baragon weigh? Who's bigger? Mecha-King Ghidorah or regular King Ghidorah? Who would win in a fight? You wanna take this outside?

Tuesday, December 10, 2002

Black people may love us , but we still smell like wet dogs in the rain. Isn't there a spray or something?

Monday, December 09, 2002
Ladies phone?!!! Uh, Samsung dudes, that does not look like a cosmetics case. It looks exactly like a toilet seat. If I made a call on this, I'd forget to fold it when I was done. Bonus points for the calorie counter. And the Bio-Rhythm function.
( via gizmodo )

Sunday, December 08, 2002
Temple Grandin: My Mind is a Web Browser
(Thanks, GVB)

Listening to XStream Radio today, nice IDM/glitchy/ambient/dub sort of vibe. Goes well with the Neo Citran

Owsley Stanley says vegetables and Sesame Street are bad for you.

Saturday, December 07, 2002
Take this nasty piece of glass off Dennis' hands. Or out of his foot. Whatever.

Human powered house moving! And people say I carry a lot of crap around on my bike.
(via Boing Boing)

At the same time that Nancy Rexroth was using the Diana to create a series of photgraphs that would make her a star in the photo world, my mom was putting the Banner, a Diana variant, into the hands of elementary school kids, and setting them loose. I recently starting printing a series of negatives that mom shot herself with the Banner, including several portraits of the camera club members, and documentation of an epic cap-gun battle. I might be a little biased 'cause she's my mom, and partly from nostalgia for the suburbs where I grew up, but I'm pretty excited about these pictures. I'll have more up soon on my diana page.

Now you can buy Luwak coffee on the internet. Can the grande skinny cat-poo latte be far off?

Thursday, December 05, 2002
It's true. Longboards are great for picking up chicks.

The nice thing about setting up a turtle-cam is that you don't actually need turtles or even a

Lately, this has been pretty much glued in my CD player. Still wondering how he wrote Elastic Man?

Wednesday, December 04, 2002
Hey, I'm not the only one who likes Fresca. Stop teasing me.

A gold star for web design goes to this page about Sodium Lauryl Sulphate. A postmodern masterpiece. Why does the cricket represent "the Dreaded 'C' ? Perhaps to maximize the horror you feel when you finally discover the animated crab GIF? It's not nice to laugh at sick people, but sometimes you just have to.

If I wasn't so busy, I'd grab some velcro and a couple of kittens , and start an amateur Pelorian site. With a little effort, some invisible wire, and a glue gun, you could make your own living recreations of classic Mainzer cat poses. Like the ones on this site.You could use real water instead of a lake applet for added realism.

Monday, December 02, 2002
Even though it's running on Palm OS, I don't think I would have put ink in the gun during my first attempts with a tattooing robot. Uh, nice piece, dude...
(via Boing Boing)

Cue the squeaky violin music.....it's a 60 acre spider web!!
Thanks Kat!

Today is the 60th aniversary of the first controlled nuclear chain reaction. Watch a friendly bee demonstrate the safety mechanism!

Sunday, December 01, 2002

Lookit the mummified collard greens or something we found in the fridge!! They were all dried up, like seaweed! Oh, sorry, make that sea vegetable. Or not.